Alternative uses for the dollar

It's unenjoyment day today, and if the ADP report has any forecasting ability whatsoever, the outcome could well be ugly. Certainly financial markets seem to be leaning that way, what with equities, bond yields, and the dollar all plunging. At some point, US two year notes are going to be a tremendous sale. For the moment, a Bloomberg-less Macro Man is happy to sit tight; after all, yields keep falling. Hopefully they'll continue to do so until he starts his new gig, at which point the first trade will be easy to decide on....

Meanwhile, the ongoing collapse of the US dollar has Macro Man (and, he suspects, many others) shaking his head. Given that the buck isn't much good as a currency anymore, what are we to do with poor old George Washington? Here's are some of Macro Man's initial thoughts...

1) Wallpaper for low-income homes. Why spend good money on paint or wallpaper, when you can just slap a recurring portrait of America's first president on the wall? It's both cheap and patriotic!

2) Wheelbarrow testing device. No doubt the manufacturers of wheelbarrows test their products using some relatively weighty ballast. What better use for the dollar, then, to be bundled up in bricks and carted around a la its Weimar ancestor?


3) As a replacement for the Zim dollar. Can't get your hands on any Zimbabwean dollars? Never fear, the US will print up a batch of Yankee dollars for ya. Pretty soon, folks won't be able to tell the difference.

4) T.P. A pack of Charmin costs $5.20. A dollar costs $1.00. You do the math!

5) As a way of supporting a car whose tires have been stolen. Why waste good money on breeze blocks when you can just use blocks of Benjamins instead?